Last year I wrote a blog post titled “Mothers Day and a Tough Weekend”. I can laugh now because my idea of a tough time then is much different than now.
Earlier this week Soren had surgery. It was a safe and routine surgery but he ended up having reactions to the anesthesia (we think). He had two emergencies in the OR and we spent a majority of the day in the PACU having him tested by Pediatric Cardiology. It sucked. I was so scared, confused, and concerned. He was in pain and so upset. As that testing was wrapping up, his surgical site began bleeding and we were eventually admitted to McMaster Children’s Hospital. The entire ordeal lasted 48 hours and we were on our way home freshly traumatized.
I learned a lot this week. Overall, I learned I can manage a lot more than I think. In my imagination, when something scary happens to my babies, I fall apart but that isn’t what happened at all. I carried on, held my head up, asked questions, took the information, and dealt with what was happening.
I also learned that those parenting and caring for sick children are incredible. We went through a tough week but he is going to be just fine. Some kids are not fine. Some families live in the hospital. Some Mommas don’t know what the outcome will be. I can’t imagine how hard it would be to exist in that space every day and my heart goes out to those that do.
After 11 years of Motherhood, I am so much more than I was before. My 3 babies earthside and 6 angel babies are forever with me – making me stronger every day. Mother’s Day this year didn’t look too much different than the day before. Kids, dishes, and a walk around the block. But I wouldn’t trade my life for anything. They say they are lucky to have me but I wouldn’t be me without them.