I am too busy to be a working Mom

Some days I take stock of the sheer amount of work I need to accomplish in a day. Today, for example, I have so much to do. The laundry is piling up, the kitchen is destroyed, there are toys, shoes, clothes, and other random household items all over the various floors in my house. There are at least a few hours of cleaning to get down. I am exhausted because my husband went away for the weekend and I work a bizarre 3 hour middle of the night shift which leaves me zombie-like for days.

I am just so tired and have so much to do. But – it is going to get so so much worse and I have no idea how I will handle it.

In four months I return to my full-time day job and life as I know it will no longer exist. More than that, I honestly have no idea how I will do it (and I can not remember how I did it before maternity leave!). Right now I work part-time on off hours so I am home all the time but I am pressed for time on the daily. Every morning has an appointment, meeting, playdate or arrangement. Every afternoon is full of chores, cooking, reading to my littles and organizing our lives (which, if you have never organized the lives of 5 people, is a lot of work). By the time everyone comes home from work and school we are eating dinner, cleaning up and starting bedtime. After that circus, we fall onto the couch for an hour before I head to bed and prepare to do it all again the next day.

Now stay with me here, cause I am not complaining. I love the way things are. I am so in love with how everything has fallen into place over the last little while and I am so lucky to be Momma to these amazing kids. My beef is: How the hell will I do this when I am gone 50 hours a week?

This post does not end with a motivational quote. Or a list of actionable steps on how to successfully be a working Mom. This is just me taking a moment to wonder how I will make this work. Stay tuned – if I figure it out I will let you know!

In meantime, please enjoy my mess: